Every year on June 12th, I get this feeling I can only describe as proud and heavy at the same time.

Proud, because — hello — we are Filipinos. We are resilient, warm, loud, full of love, and honestly some of the most hardworking people on this planet. Heavy, because independence — real independence — isn’t just something that happened in 1898 in Kawit, Cavite when Pres. Emilio Aguinaldo waved our flag for the first time. It’s something we keep earning. Every single day.

And lately, I’ve been thinking: what does it even mean to truly live free?

Not politically. Not historically (though that matters too). But personally. Deeply. In the way that counts when you’re lying awake at 2 a.m. wondering if you’re doing life right.

I came across a list that stopped me mid-scroll. One of those rare pieces of writing that hits you somewhere behind the sternum and just stays there. It was called “Before You Die as a Human” — and I felt like I needed to sit with it. Especially today, on Independence Day.

Because what better day to ask yourself: am I actually living — or am I just surviving?

So here it is. My take on 20 things worth doing before you kick the bucket…….. 😮

1. Tell the people you love that you love them — while they’re still here.

Sounds cliché, but I almost didn’t say it enough to my dad before he passed. Don’t be like me. Say it now. Say it today. Send the text. Make the call. Don’t wait for a birthday or a holiday or the “right moment.” The right moment is always now.

2. Watch a sunrise without touching your phone.

I mean it. Leave the phone inside. Just sit with the sky. We live in the Philippines — our sunrises are ridiculous in the best way possible. There’s something about watching light pour over the ocean that puts everything back in perspective. Your notifications will still be there. The sunrise won’t wait.

3. Forgive yourself for being imperfect.

This one took me years. YEARS. I used to beat myself up for every mistake, every bad decision, every version of me that fell short — every wrong word that came out impulsively, every reaction I wish I could take back, every time my hypersensitivity got the better of me. But you know what? That younger, messier, more confused version of me was doing her best with what she had. So were you. Give yourself some grace.

4. Travel somewhere that humbles you.

I’ve been to places that made me feel incredibly small — and I mean that in the most beautiful way. Standing at the edge of a mountain in Japan, or floating in the middle of the Indian Ocean, or even just getting lost in a barangay in Sorsogon — it rewires you. Your ego shrinks. Your heart expands. Go somewhere that reminds you how vast this world is and how small your worries become when you finally put them in perspective.

5. Fall deeply in love at least once.

Not just romantically — though yes, that too. But fall in love with life itself. With the smell of the earth after the rain (my absolute favorite, and yes, that is petrichor :)). With the way Cebuano sounds when someone is genuinely, uncontrollably laughing. With the way your partner goofs around just to make you smile, for no reason other than love. With the tiny heart attack you feel watching your kid ride off on his own — cycling to a town 100 km away like it’s nothing — and realizing he’s becoming his own person. With your mother’s daily Facebook messages, even if it’s just a random meme or a gif she probably got from a group chat. With the stray cats and dogs you pass on your way home at night, the ones that have somehow become familiar faces on your street. With movement, with art, with the ocean, with the silence between songs. Fall in love with being alive.

6. Laugh until your stomach hurts.

Some of the most sacred moments of my life were completely unplanned and absolutely ridiculous. A wrong turn that became an adventure. A joke that sent everyone into hysterics in a small karinderya at midnight. The moment your tears well up from a scene in a TV series so funny you can’t even explain why it hit that hard. These moments can’t be recreated. Collect them.

7. Spend real, present time with your parents.

Put the phone down when you’re with them. Ask them about their lives — not just the practical stuff, but their dreams, their regrets, their younger selves. One day, you will realize they were getting older while you were busy living your life. I know this firsthand. Don’t learn it the hard way.

8. Sit alone peacefully — without needing distraction.

Try it. Five minutes. No podcast, no scroll, no music. Just you and your thoughts. If silence makes you uncomfortable, that’s the exact reason you need to practice it. There are parts of yourself still waiting to be heard.

9. Help someone who can never repay you.

I think about my bookkeeper, who once walked with me to withdraw money I needed for a settlement while I was crying. She shared her story — five kids, started from nothing, never asked for anything in return. She just helped because she could. That kind of kindness is rare. Be that person for someone.

10. Learn how to let go.

People leave. Seasons end. Relationships change shape. The job you thought defined you — gone. The friendship you thought was forever — complicated. Holding on too tight to anything is how you miss everything that’s still right in front of you. Peace is on the other side of release.

11. Dance, sing, create, or express yourself freely.

I’m guilty of holding back. Of performing fitness instead of just moving for joy. Of writing for metrics instead of meaning. But the truest version of yourself is the one that creates without an audience. Don’t die with your real self trapped inside someone else’s expectations.

12. Spend time in nature — often.

The forest, the rain, the ocean, the mountains — these are not luxuries. They are medicine. We are lucky enough to live in one of the most naturally beautiful countries in the world. Go outside. Take the trail. Swim in the river. Breathe it in.

13. Stop trying so hard to be liked.

I spent a big portion of my twenties performing a version of myself I thought people wanted to see. It’s exhausting. It’s also a complete waste of time. The people who matter will like the real you. The ones who don’t — well, that’s actually useful information.

14. Heal the parts of you still hurting.

Unhealed pain doesn’t disappear. It just moves — into your relationships, your decisions, the way you react to things that shouldn’t bother you as much as they do. Therapy, honest conversations, journaling, prayer, rest — whatever your path is, take it. You deserve to feel whole.

15. Take photos with the people you love.

I know, I know — we live in an age of over-documenting everything. I do it almost all the time. But I’m not talking about content. I’m talking about your mom’s smile. Your kid’s laugh. A Sunday lunch that meant nothing special at the time and everything later. Print them. Frame them. Keep them.

16. Cry honestly when life hurts.

I once tried to hold it together so hard that I made myself physically sick. Crying isn’t weakness. It’s your body’s way of processing what your mind can’t yet organize. Let it out. Scream till your throat hurts. Holding everything in doesn’t make the pain disappear — it just buries it somewhere it quietly does more damage.

17. Learn something beyond money and survival.

Study something that has no tangible ROI. Philosophy. Spirituality. Art history. A language just because it’s beautiful. Music theory. The deeper questions of existence. Not everything has to be monetized. Some things are worth knowing just because they make you more human.

18. Experience true stillness at least once.

A quiet mind is genuinely one of the rarest things. I’ve chased it in Pilates, in cold plunges, in long runs — and occasionally, for just a few minutes, I’ve found it. It feels like coming home. If you’ve never felt it, keep looking. It’s worth the search.

19. Stop postponing your happiness.

“When I lose the weight.” “When I get the promotion.” “When the kids are older.” “When things settle down.” My friend, life doesn’t wait. It’s happening right now, in this exact, imperfect, unfinished moment. Be here for it.

20. Leave this world kinder than you found it.

This is the one I keep coming back to. At the end of it all, people won’t remember your highlight reel. They’ll remember how you made them feel. The kindness you extended when you didn’t have to. The time you showed up. That’s the legacy worth building.

Parting Words

On this Independence Day, I don’t just want to wave a flag or post a patriotic caption (though both are totally valid).

I want to remind you — and honestly, remind myself — that freedom isn’t just political. It’s personal. It’s the freedom to live honestly, love fully, cry when you need to, laugh until it hurts, and show up as your whole, unfiltered self.

We are Filipinos. We have survived things that would have broken lesser nations. We carry so much — in our history, in our families, in our everyday lives.

But surviving was never the whole point.

“Before you die — don’t just survive life.
Feel it.
Love through it.
Cry through it.
Grow through it.
Awaken through it.”

Maligayang Araw ng Kalayaan 🇵🇭